Watching porn together

Posted on 02. Dec, 2009 by C in Marriage, Sex

Why don’t all women love porn? All us men do right? I enjoy watching it every once in a while. I will admit there have been times that I have watched a little too much, but not for the wrong reasons, like not enough sex with Roxy. Rather it seemed to be something I would do during times I was overly horny (which does actually happen quite a bit). Women and pornography don’t always seem to go together as well as men and porn. Why is this? Well there are a few reasons: one being that most porn may not be a turn-on for many women because it’s so fake and not the kind of sex that women get turned on by. The second prominent reason is that many women are conditioned to view porn in a negative way due to other influences like religious beliefs, family beliefs and personal values even if secretly they fantasize about it or want to watch it.

The fact is that not everybody (male or female) likes to watch porn, and no matter what, many never will. Porn isn’t for everyone.

To start watching porn as a couple, there are a few things that couples can do. The first is to discuss what they want to watch – together. Discussing porn couples may find that they have some sort of emotional or sexual response to it. This may lead to things that don’t even let you get to the movie.

If you get to the movies, you also need to know what your preferences are (i.e., lesbian, gay, straight, etc.)? Each member of the couple needs to allow each other the freedom to reveal their thoughts – one may quite enjoy watching men have sex with each other, and this may not sit very comfortably with the other half of the couple. Be prepared for what each of you has to say, as many men and women actually love watching porn of all descriptions.

Regardless of how much or what kind of porn you choose, the most important thing is don’t ever use porn as a substitute for intimacy. This is generally what annoys Roxy the most about porn and why I am very cautious to not watch too much. We have decided to try to only watch it together. The reality is that we get so much more out of it by watching it together. It is kind of like that innocent foot rub that always leads to more…

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  • C
    Thanks Randi - good advice!
  • Make sure you're watching the right kind of porn. Women don't like films where oral sex on men is the only event. Women don't like films where the woman appears uncomfortable.

    Find a film where the women genuinely seem to be enjoying themselves and your partner will probably be interested.
  • Greg and I watch porn together regularly. Man, laptops and wireless internet are a god-send to the whole concept of couples watching porn together.

    We'll climb into bed, naked, of course, and rest the laptop between us on our bellies, hit our favorite free porn sites and scroll through video after video. We talk, we comment on what is enticing to us, we point out what is not-so-sexy.

    We touch and tease each other. Ultimately, we end up pushing the laptop aside and getting it on. What intense and hot sex we have had during these little moments...

    Yep, count me in for Team Watching Porn Together.
  • C
    spanjam007 completely agree: "porn should never be substituted for intimacy and anyone who uses it for such is only causing detriment to their marriage than temporal relief."
  • C
    BobF - good on you to be proactive in looking for someone who shares your interests and desires before it can become a potential problem in your relationship.
  • spanjam007
    We started watching porn together from early in our marriage and have noticed tremendous strides in the industry in making films more appealing to couples, specifically women, to which we applaud. We definitely concur that porn should never be substituted for intimacy and anyone who uses it for such is only causing detriment to their marriage than temporal relief.
  • As a long time porn 'addict' (first porn watched in 1970, haven't stopped since) I know the truth of your words. In early years of my marriage we did exactly as you suggest, watched together, talked about it, and fucked while watching. Later in our failing marriage, I found myself turning to porn as a substitute for intimacy, and that definitely hurt our marriage a lot.

    So now, I look for a partner willing to once again share the pleasures of watching and talking and fucking.
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